Dominance & Submissions
by F.J. Bergmann
Distressing
tales of poor judgment, simple ignorance, bad manners, and other
contributing factors to editors’ horror stories continually
surface. There are protocols for submitting poems anywhere, from WFOP publications
to national literary journals. Etiquette standards apply to handling
rejections (or, for that matter, acceptances) graciously. Part of
the problem comes from variable procedures across the editorial spectrum;
much of it comes from unreasonable expectations on the part of uninformed
poets.
General
No-nos
Stuff which will cause your poems to be looked
askance at from the get-go:
- Ignoring
the stated guidelines, no matter how idiosyncratic (supersedes
items 2–6).
- Anything
but plain white paper (also omit clip art , fancy letterheads,
and colored ink—and NO emoticons! :< ). While ornamenting
the surroundings may not change the quality of the poem itself,
it
will affect the editor’s perception of the author’s
judgment and experience.
- Weird
fonts. Pedestrian serif 12-point fonts such as Garamond, Palatino,
or Times New Roman are recommended for readability (while sans-serif
fonts are more legible on the web than in print, the confusion
between lower-case L, capital I, and the number 1 tends to persist.
And Helvetica is just plain ugly). Never put your entire
poem in italics or bold type. Don’t even dream of submitting
anything handwritten, other than your signature on the cover
letter!
- Misspelt
words. Run the damn spell-checker (which is no substitute for
owning and using a dictionary). What message does an editor get
from seeing that you can’t be bothered to proofread your
work?
- Bad
grammar. Have someone else, preferably with a better education
than yours, go over your poem. Note that this does not necessarily
apply to a poem where diction is used to create the voice of
a specific persona; but be consistent.
- Centering
the poem for no good reason, lower-case I, unnecessary ellipses
(…) and em-dashes (—), and archaic diction tend to annoy some
editors. Double-spacing is also counterproductive. Did
I mention emoticons? Be warned.
E-submissions
Single-space only; no giant font sizes (it can
easily be enlarged if necessary). Disable ornamental signatures, quotes, backgrounds,
etc. Do not copy-and-paste from a document with page breaks or indents. If indents
or large white spaces are necessary to your poem, use the space bar, not the
tab key. If you are worried about losing formatting, indicate italics with an
underline _ on each side of the word or phrase_. Symbols like smart quotes,
em-dashes, and ellipses frequently mutate; substitute plain quotes, double hyphens,
and 3 periods instead. If necessary, line breaks can be indicated by /, stanza
breaks by //, and the end of the poem by * * *. Unusual formatting
aspects can and should be indicated by the submitter, e.g. "My poem should
be typeset in the shape of a fanged bat."
The
Poof is in the Pudding
Sadly, about 80% of the 2006 Poets' Calendar submissions
(I did the typing and layout for that year’s editors) had grammatical,
punctuation, or spelling errors. Presumably this is typical of the quality of
submitter proofreading capabilities. It is a dictum that once you have looked
at your poem more than once or twice, you will no longer be able to spot any
typos that remain. Get someone else (if possible, several someones) to proofread
your submission before sending it. Don't depend on editors to spot something
you will regret when it appears in print.
We
Don’t Need No Stinkin’ Directions
If the guidelines say “three poems” don’t
send five. Or, heaven forbid, a dozen. If they say “no attachments” don’t
send any. If they say “MS Word .docs only” don’t attach WordPerfect
or Quark files. Not including a SASE when directed to do so (many editors prefer
to respond via e-mail) will ensure that your submission goes straight into the
trash, unread, at some publications.
All
About You
Send the length of bio requested. Or shorter—no
one will reproach you for taking up less space than anyone else. A word of warning:
many Calendar bios achieved a clone-like similarity. No accusations
of plagiarism are being made, but individuality would be best achieved by omitting
any mention of:
a)
one’s love of nature, enjoyment of gardening, or inspiration
by Wisconsin’s beautiful outdoors.
b) children or grandchildren (although details of the activities used to
produce them will definitely capture an editor’s interest).
The
portion of the lay public still unenraptured with rap expects the
average poet to be a sweet old lady who gardens and writes poems
about nature. Shatter the stereotype by mentioning something completely
unexpected or intriguing about yourself!
Becoming
a Hissing and a Byword
While most poets do not need to be told this, there
have been a few episodes of bad behavior that desperately need to be suppressed.
Be aware that editors, in general, are unlikely to comment on your work and have
absolutely no obligation to do so. Since the Wisconsin Poets’ Calendar editors
change every year, their opinions are not useful with respect to future submissions,
in any case. It is the height of arrogance and immaturity to demand explanations
following a rejection. This is an excellent way to blacklist yourself with editors
that do not change every year—and even when they do, the word
gets out.
Many
editors and writers are more than willing to critique for money
(e-mail me to discuss my oh-so-reasonable rates), but unless you
have paid or otherwise arranged for the service in advance, no
editor owes you a rationale or explanation of any sort. The Calendar receives
close to 10 times more poems than are published; some journals
get hundreds, or thousands, of poems for each one they accept,
and could not reply individually even if they wanted to.
For an extended discussion of rejection protocol, see nielsenhayden.com/makinglight/archives/004641.html.
Strangely,
many aspiring contributors who claim to want feedback on their
poems, or rationale for a rejection, are just as displeased when
they get it....
Inquire
Within
Reputable publications indicate what their response
time is. It is perfectly appropriate to send a polite letter (again enclosing
a SASE) or e-mail of inquiry, once that time has elapsed. If no response to your
inquiry is received within two weeks (assuming that it is not the off-season
for an academic press), you have several options, all correct: you can send off
yet another inquiry, with another SASE, mentioning that the first inquiry received
no reply (ideally, this would be sent to the general editor, naming the original
editor to whom you submitted); try e-mailing instead, if the original submission
was by snail-mail (or vice versa); telephone, if the number is available (and
for academic journals, their institution’s English Department always seems
to have this information); or continue to wait patiently (the record in response
time, for those who are interested, is 17 [yes, that’s a two-digit number]
years).
If
you receive no reply to an inquiry or inquiries, it is also appropriate
to send one last letter or e-mail, summarizing your correspondence
and informing them that you are withdrawing the submission unless
you hear from them in two weeks. And then you’re free to
send it elsewhere. Editors don’t owe you an explanation of
why they rejected you; they DO owe you, always, a response to your
submission, provided you have complied with their guidelines. Always
double-check these at the journal website if possible; the Poet’s
Market is, of necessity, at least a year out of date, and
other references may also no longer be current.
How
to Be Good
Useful feedback on your poems is best obtained by asking
other poets to read them or listen to them. Go to open mikes and readings; join
critique groups; attend workshops; read other poets’ work in journals and
books. Read contemporary poetry, i.e. poetry that is being published now.
Familiarity with poetry from other eras is both valuable and instructive, but
a stylistically accurate imitation of, say, Lord Byron or James Whitcomb Riley
is unlikely to be publishable anywhere. A staggering amount of poetry and writing
information is available on the internet, as well as many communities of writers,
in a full spectrum of skill levels. Try to get help from someone who is being
published and/or whose work you admire.
© 2006 F.J.
Bergmann
Addendum:
Even More Horrible Stuff It Never Occurred to Me Anyone Would Actually
Do
DO NOT SUBMIT POEMS IN ALL CAPS. Do Not Capitalize Each Word As
If Even An Article Were Some Kind Of Obscenely Valuable Commodity;
Metaphorically, It's Like Bronzing A Discarded Jock Strap. Do not,
do not, do not submit poems
as a spreadsheet file! I've seen all these things actually happen—for
the 2008 Wisconsin Poets Calendar, one person
submitted their poem as an Excel file, and another submitted poems
in some out-of-date Microsoft spreadsheet application. What on
earth were they thinking? It is also thoughtless, because the file
sizes are so large, to submit poems as .pdfs without good and compelling
reason—and prior notification and approval. |